Tuesday, November 10, 2009

This could be the very minute I’m aware I’m alive

In Loving Memory of Hilda Teo

25th September 2009 - 10th November 2009

Cause of death: Pwned by Physics' test

Life is pretty fucking bleak as I'd always said. Even my readers are getting less and less cause my life is nothing close to happiness but boring and dull and emo pffffft Do you have that moment of your life when you feel like giving up and just hide somewhere else where no one can find you? I hate myself more than anything right now. I'm starting to fall apart like those days and trust me I'm not okay. I miss having those who cares for me around me yet they're so far away. To set the record straight, this is my first time handing in the answer sheet with not even 1/4 of the questions answered. Dreadful, I tell you. I've never been this pathetic before and this is why I'm so disappointed of myself. I don't feel like doing the test right away, I just sat there and staring on my paper blankly. I don't know what had gotten into me but I knew that I need someone to give me a wake up call or just rip my head. I'm not blaming anyone for this, I know it's my own fault. I'm not growing up. I can't go on like this. This is serious. I feel like listening to sad sad songs and cry my whole heart out.

You just don't understand.

Note to future self: Sorry I failed you.


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